Britney was my sex-mad bride

Not mine, unfortunately. Ah the things I could teach her (bwah-ha-ha!)

Folks, if you don't read this, you're missing the steamiest scenes this side of daytime soaps. If true, then we can see why Britney has gone nuts: her family pried her out of a true love relationship. Now she's hooked up with the biggest possible loser and alienated her home town. Read it and find out more.

Here's a bonus Britney photo, just because I can:

McDonald's sued over fat

"The suit -- filed in a San Francisco federal court... "

STOP! You need not continue.

I've been told this suit seeks no monetary damages. My fat ass....this is a step in a series of legal moves to establish McDonald's liability in court. The money may not start flowing now, but the legal pickaxes are chipping away.

Order: health club shut over gay sex

"A Wall Street health club that caters to gay men was ordered shut by an appeals court yesterday after city inspectors reported observing dozens of sex acts by patrons."

No! You DON'T say?! Next thing you're going to tell me that there's gay sex going on in bathhouses!

"'The closure of the entire facility represents an important win for New York's efforts to protect the health of its citizens,' said city lawyer John Hogrogian."

Place your bets on how long before someone decries this as "bigotry" and files a lawsuit on behalf of the "victims" of this act.

As a civil libertarian, I have to laugh. For months, we've heard betrothed gays and lesbians clamoring for "legal recognition by the state." Well, now they've got it in NYC.

File under: "be careful what you wish for..."

U.S. Still the Holy See's Top Source of Funding

Amen to that.

tick...tick...tick...

Death4Bush is a certain sign of the continuing mental state of the left.

"I, David Blomstrom, a candidate for state office (Washington
State Superintendent of Public Instruction), hereby declare my belief
that President George W. Bush deserves and should receive the death
penalty, after the appropriate legal or quasi-legal formalities. I
urge other patriotic Americans and foreign nationals alike to openly
call for Bush’s execution. Furthermore, I sent my first press release
announcing my position to Al-Jazeera in a symbolic gesture designed
to call attention to the corruption that runs rampant in America’s
media."

Oh incredible! As if Al-Jazeera is a totally unbiased media outlet! I love how this so-called American not only calls for the death penalty (I thought the left didn't like that sort of thing) but he acts as if it is a certainty.

I did a lttle research and found that this traitor was a public school teacher - i.e. sucked off the sugar-tit of government pay - who was fired recently and is now running to supervise the educational system. If these comments are any iindication, there were grounds for his dismissal.

Since he has little use for due process, I say we haul this guy into the loony bin and throw away the key. These are not the ramblings or acts of a sane man. If he can pre-determine President Bush's guilt, then pre-analysis of his condition is only fair.

Republican Bias at Fox News Documented in New Film, Featuring Former Employees

I was intrigued enough to read this if only slightly concerned by the effects of such a documentary.

Now the truth can be told. This is part of a coordinated assault in the wake of Michael Moore's muckraking film to discredit a news organization that isn't openly partisan but does give shelter to conservative journalists who would be blacklisted elsewhere. It's also part of a larger strategy to polarize the public, regardless of the facts.

Proof? I scanned this press release and connected a few obvious dots:

CODE IN THE SUB-HEAD: "Progressives Call for Media Reform"
WHAT IT REALLY MEANS: Progressive is a label for leftists. "Media Reform" to them means stamping out voices which don't tow the same party line favored by the rest of the liberal media. If they want media "reform, " why then is Fox News the only media outlet targeted?

Why is no mention of the first amendment made in this statement? Because it gets in the way of their aim, which is to slience conservatives.

THE SHADOWY COALITION: Moveon.org and Common Cause
WHAT IT REALLY MEANS: When it comes to Moveon.org, no explanation is necessary. If you're not familiar with this far-left organization, know that they have sponsored Al Gore's recent rantings, have pushed Moore's film like a crusade, and sponsored commercials linking President Bush with Hitler. As for Common Cause, for years they pitched themselves as the people's answer to powerful lobbyists, but as Jeff Birnbaum wrote recently in the Washington Post, they're facing irrelevance:

"...the core of its efforts for decades has been restraining the influence of money on politics. It was at the forefront of the post-Watergate reforms in the mid-1970s. And its role in enacting landmark campaign finance legislation two years ago was so significant that the new law could well have been called McCain-Feingold-Common Cause.

"These days Common Cause isn't at the forefront of anything. Its grass-roots lobbying techniques have been replicated and improved upon by its corporate nemeses. And its heady success on campaign finance reform has had the effect of robbing it of its signature issue.

"The organization has fallen victim to the worst malady that any group in politics can face: total victory. Without a big, long-term issue to pursue, its leaders say Common Cause has been forced to fight for its life."

Desperate times demand desperate measures. Common Cause partnering with MoveOn.org is about as desperate as...well, Al Gore trying to stay relevant and partnering with MoveOn.org. They're both like the main character in the movie "Seconds," looking for a new life, a brighter future, another time to jump in with the young people and be loved again, only it's all fake.

THE DIRECTOR OF THE SO-CALLED EXPOSE: Robert Greenwald
WHAT HIS PRESENCE MEANS: He is the director of a documentary slamming Bush and exposing the "real" Iraq war. A known lefty.

THE CO-CONSPIRATORS: Arianna Huffington, The American Prospect, Eric Alterman
WHAT THEIR INVOLVEMENT MEANS: A an ex-wife of great privilege, Arianna is an ex-conservative who backed John McCain. Ever since, she has gone on a personal vendetta against Bush to the point of extreme hypocrisy. The American Prospect is a liberal rag bordering on communist tool. Eric Alterman is a liberal mouthpiece for Newsweek and MSNBC who has a book refuting the so-called liberal bias in the media, written specifically to counter Bernard Goldberg's two whistle-blowing books exposing it at CBS and elsewhere. Three parties proven wrong over and over again, so now they're attacking their main attacker.

THE BOTTOM LINE: Our liberties are always under attack by leftists who disagree, which is not surprising considering their strategy is "divide and conquer." Now, they go after Fox News who dares to be different. Like Moore's film, this is another example of their strategy of disinformation to inject chaos into the electoral process in hopes of frustrating the public.

THE ANSWER: I'll let Bill O'Reilly go first. I'm sure he'll sound off on Monday.

Four gored during Pamplona bull run

"John Doyle, 22, of Dunwoody, Ga., was gored in the groin and would probably be hospitalized for a day or two, said Dr. Wilfredo Soler of Virgen del Camino Hospital."

In other words, one horn to the groin and his woody is done.

"The other injured American was a 22-year-old man from Louisiana who was gored in the left knee, Soler said. The American requested that his name not be disclosed."

No, cher, I'm not gonna hav' dat bull tear mah sack open no sir! And I sho ain't gonna have mah name all over dat teevee lak' some fool, no! My momma might see dat!

Ken sure got around! CEO tied to Kerrys, too

From no less than the BostonHerald:

"Kerry and Teresa Heinz Kerry reported more than $250,000 in Enron stock ownership before the firm's 2003 collapse. Kerry also was forced to return a campaign contribution from an implicated Enron executive.

"And Heinz Kerry served on a charity board with Lay, even after he was implicated in the alleged fraud, records show."

Boaters find kitten swimming 3 miles offshore in Gulf of Mexico

People who actively hate cats aren't necessarily uncouth, inbred, hillbilly-mountain-dwelling, dim-witted, unculturted neanderthal rubes who shouldn't be allowed to reproduce. But they might be.

See, I like cats. Cats are inherently cool. Not cool like "the Fonz" - nothing from a TV sitcom is cool unless that sitcom is the Dick Van Dyke Show. I mean cool like Jimmy Smith or a bossa nova song or James Coburn or the Beastie Boys.

Don't get me wrong: I like dogs too, now. I love dogs because they love unconditionally and are unfailingly loyal. But cats add another dimension to one's life. Where dogs are direct and straightforward, cats are enigmatic - except when they're hungry. Man does not live by bread alone unless he is all id. A cultured man appreciates that with rock, one must have roll, with hot one must have cold.

What's so great about cats is how over time they build up trust and dependence with their owners. My cats long ago surrendered all their independent pretentions and follow me around like a pair of puppies. I've passed their ancient, instinctual trust test and they have given themselves to me completely. My eldest cat, Petey, has been with me since the same month I graduated high school in 1979 and remains not only in amazingly good health but devoted to me as if I were his god. I can't take a walk around the block without him tagging along.

I suspect some riff-raff tried to get rid of this kitten by tossing it into the gulf. How sad. I'm fond of quoting this one-hit band's biggest hit: "Everybody knows the world is full of stupid people" (the Refreshments, "Banditos".) Anyone who can't hold a baby cat in his hand and not feel some affection is a dense, cold-hearted being.

One day, I'd like to have an english bulldog but for now I'll take my cats.

Bin Laden Is Said to Be Organizing for a U.S. Attack

Chasing the Single Voter: It's Time for a Christian Perspective

"The Democrats' 'Sex in the City' approach to targeting singles - campaign slogans on panties? - reflects our culture's shallow view of the single life."

And of human life in general.

Not So Fast, John Kerry; Survey Says President Bush Has Best Hair

Stop this madness now!

'Sex tent' at music festival stirs debate

What the hell is going on in Norway? It seems like they've become as depraved as...well, us.

Couple won't pay fine for sex on stage

"Porn is just a means of reaching our goals."

That line is too stupidly brilliant and brilliantly stupid to warrant any further discourse.

Superficiality

"An upbeat John Kerry campaigned for the first time with running mate John Edwards on Wednesday and boasted that the Democratic team has a 'better vision, better ideas' than its Republican counterpart - and joked, 'we've got better hair.'"

Isn't this just like the democrats? They truly believe that the more handsome candidate will win. That's typical of their lack of depth. This is an election, not a casting call.

14-Year-Old Murder Defendant Escapes After Gluing Electronic Monitor To Cat

Strange behavior redux: case in point...

Couple had sex on stage during concert

Talk about your added special attractions. This couple's mission is to turn porn-derived profits over to environmental causes, and yet they're giving this away for free!

Depravity knows no bounds. Imagine the most outrageous behavior human beings might possibly engage in and somehwere in the world it's either going on or has happened before.

Star Trek's Scotty diagnosed with Alzheimer's

When James Doohan visited KLSU a decade ago, he was as open and frank as any public figure could be in front of a microphone. As a matter of fact, he had a thing or two to say about the egotistical William Shatner which we caught for posterity on digital audio tape. Somewhere in the posession of either the station or our Program Director Brad Growden is Scotty saying of the Captain "he wears a girdle just like a little girl!" He meant every word, too: he went out of his way to repeat these things over and over to one of the interviewers, an exchange student from the UK and an avowed Trekkie.

I'm sorry to hear he has Alzheimer's. He was a delight to meet and converse with.

Who Is John Edwards?

This says it all: "SENATOR JOHN EDWARDS: UNACCOMPLISHED
AND INEXPERIENCED"

Moore's web swept away

SPIDER-MAN 2: $31,760,000

FAHRENHEIT 9/11: $5,166,000

Oh well.

God Bless America

Heavenly Father, Creator, God, we humbly thank You for the gift of our Nation, the United States of America.  We thank you for its humble beginnings which were based on living under Your law. We thank you for our prosperity, our freedom, and the peace we behold in this country.  We pray for forgiveness of the  offenses, which we as a country are guilty; abortion, gay marriage, assisted suicide, and the many other atrocities committed against Your creation.  Father, help us to defend our Catholic faith in the public arena for we are members of Your one true church.  Help us to be bold in our committment to let our Light, the Light of Christ, shine before all men.  Help us to spread Your gospel throughout this land that it may once again truely claim to be one nation under God.  This we ask in Jesus' name, in unity with You and the Holy Ghost, one God forever and ever. Amen.


Today, I made the drive to New Orleans to attend the High Mass at Old St. Patrick's Church on Camp Street. It was the best of all worlds, truly: the solemnity of the Mass in it's sung Latin form, peppered with classic hymns like "Holy Holy Holy" and patriotic songs like "America The Beautiful" and "God Bless America". Awed as I usually am by the beauty of the liturgy, I sat there contemplating what it meant to be alive at this time in this place. It struck me that as the Church (big C) is the most fully realized expression of Christianity, our nation has similar significance in human history.

Not since Rome has there been a republic equal to America. Now, more than ever, I believe America with it's amber waves of grain and purple mountains majesties, fits in with God's plan for his salvation. By giving us our freedom and enshrining it in our way of life, we can grow in a more meaningful relationship with Him because we choose to follow Him. By valuing freedom - the most visible manifestation of God's own gift of a free will to each and every one of us - we as a nation and a people of faith strive to bring that same freedom to the enslaved, downtrodden and ignorant, at home and abroad. We value the dignity and goodness of every individual human person as another way of seeing God's handiwork in all people.

Of course, the downside is that we can - and do - stray further than we ever have. We often forget to return the sentiment with sufficient praise. Frankly, continuous 24/7 praise for a thousand years can never repay God's greatest gifts. I pray He continues to watch over our nation and guide us in spreading the knowledge of His goodness throughout the world.

Call me hokey or jingoist, and I'll please guilty on all counts. And thank God for it. How grateful we should be for being born American.